Tuesday, August 31, 2010

Simple Solution

Given these two findings:

"The longer you sit, the earlier you die"


"Heavy drinkers outlive nondrinkers"

the solution seems simple - let people drink at work!

No one appreciates my genius, I tell ya.

(I found this image on the internet a few years ago when I was designing the original Derelicts shirt. If anyone knows who owns the original pic, let me know and I'll link to it with attribution)


D said...

on first glance I thought you said "I'll drink to him" instead of 'link to him'..

More fitting, eh?

scummy said...

Was just discussing this with the Hen. Pity I didn't get the Furst. A lot of effort to discredit the story because it didn't fit what the powers that be preach.

I do have a couple of the derelicts shirts however.

Fucking work, home ownership and daily life chaos fucking with my fursts.

Lavi D. said...

Fucking work, home ownership and daily life chaos fucking with my fursts.

Keep an eye on the Stress-O-Meter, there, Scum.

D said...

either keep an eye on the Stress Meter (tm) or go have another beer.

Remember what Homer says:
"To alcohol! The cause of... and solution to... all of life's problems"

Ded Scum said...

I shall do BOTH!

Since I died I am drinking a lot less...I am also more chillaxed.

I'm back at work and LURVE my job.

I also just got to pay for a vet $500 to sew the fuck up one of my many dependants (think over a dozen) for getting into fights.

So, let's review:

Single - dinner drinks gambling....tab 100-300 bucks and you get secks. She goes away and may or may not be seen or sexed again.

Committed - Her car repairs = $1000 each time. Her pet repairs = $500 each time. Her kid in school repairs = &100 - 400. Secks depends on = whether she is too tired, in the mood, mad at me, or if I mention the j-o-b thingy or who the fuck cares?

So I'm down to under a twelve pack (St. Pauli or Heini a day).

On the bright side...she loves me, helped me when I dropped ded and I lurve her.

That doesn't clean the 20,000 gallon pool, pay the $500 electric bill (females have such sensitive heat issues) or pick up the fucking Dawg Shit.

If I ever turn to the Ghey Secks side to reduce the Stress-O-Meter I will ask for it from you furst Lavi.

Thank you for caring. Thank you as well D - I laughed deep from the belly when I read that.

Ded Guyz rant so much BETTER!

Lavi D. said...

Ded Guyz rant so much BETTER!

Scum, you outdid yourself. I am honored to host that most excellent paen.

And with such kewl alternative spellings.

Hell, I'd almost let you have secks with me... if you weren't a guy and all.

Every now and then when your life gets complicated and the weasels start closing in, the only cure is to load up on heinous chemicals and then drive like a bastard from Hollywood to Las Vegas ... with the music at top volume and at least a pint of ether.

-Hunter S. Thompson

Dedicated to the other side of Las Vegas, namely; the sprawling, mad, incoherent underpinnings of the world's favorite destination.

That, and the occasional ranting about nothing in particular.